Monday, October 16, 2017

Low Ball / Low Total Exhibition Results

Wentworth is hard. Heard a few "I'm never playing here again" comments out there. The greens were in great shape, but why are they so tiny? So many ways you could make that course better. Anyway:

Big money (up to $60) on the line yesterday. Robbie and Katie stomped the JW's... winning the full total. I expected Katie to have some rust since she hasn't played much lately. Instead she fired a 93, lowering her handicap index by another 1.1 points. Speaking of, we currently only have three members with an index in the 20s. Keep it up!

Chandler and Faz had to win two points on the final hole to avoid paying $60 to Gary and Tall Mike. The Moose was playing out of his mind, and carried Gary to the money (only $20, unfortunately). But a win is a win.

Scottish Dave took an early Brexit, refusing the play on a broken leg like Tiger did in the 2008 US Open. The last time Tiger won a Major. Nine years ago. Anyway... I hope he's OK. Get your shit fixed in the off-season!

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Our next exhibition is tentatively scheduled for December 10th, with a bar outing on the 8th. Put it on your calendars, and be ready to RSVP when I make the post. It will once again be a first come, first served event... with a requirement of even teams. Also, if you own a High School "letter jacket," go find it and get ready.

I just lost some relationship power and the wife is making me go out of town the weekend of December 10th. I'll make a post soon about possible other dates and choose the one the most people can play.

Friday, October 13, 2017

Sunday Pairings & Handicaps

UPDATE: The off-season is not only a time to forget how to swing a club... but also to forget how to calculate handicaps. Dave pointed out I didn't account for the "different tees" adjustment. Updated handicaps are below:

Buchert (2) & Ho (2) vs. Dave (0) & Darren (7)

Chandler (0) & Faz (6) vs. Gary (7) & Tall Mike (7)

JW (3) & John (1) vs. Robbie (0) & Katie (11)

Remember to bring $60 in cash, which is the max you can lose. Darren plays this game all the time, so I know the first group is good to go. I'm in the 2nd group so we're cool. The final group... John just played it last weekend so do whatever he says.

See you all at Wentworth. 9:30 tee time so get there early.

And just so when you all yell at me tomorrow, below is the math for peer review:


Monday, October 9, 2017

This Sunday

Wentworth is booked for the 6 registered teams... 9:40am.... $35 plus tax.

You have until Friday to tell me what tees you'd like to play (both players don't need to be on the same set). Everyone is on the BLUE unless I hear otherwise (Katie on Red).


 
 
On Friday I'll calculate handicaps and we'll figure out who your opponent is. The game is a $20 Nassau of Low-Ball/Low-Total (LGBT!). If anyone needs help transitioning, let me know.

Wednesday, September 20, 2017

DPT LB-LT Event - October 15th

Let's attempt our first off-season event on October 15th:
  • Teams consisting of two people.
  • 80% handicap allowance
  • Low Ball / Low Total format: lowest individual net score is worth a team point, and lowest combined team net score is worth a point. Maximum of two points a hole with no rollovers. If you've never played this I'll explain in detail later.
  • We should make it worth something so like $15 Nassau ($45 max loss)... or just straight up $50 for all 18 holes. Discuss in the comments!
  • The 3 new guys are allowed but no guests!
  • Form your own two man teams. Reach out to who you want to play with and if they agree, make a comment!
  • Mixed tees allowed. Course will be announced soon.
  • Once I have all the teams registered, we will sort the list by total handicap. 1 will play 2, 3 will play 4, etc...
Much more to come. But start posting who you're playing with and choose wisely! We will need an even number of teams, so this is also first come, first served. If we have an odd number, then the last team to register gets booted. Sorry. But not really sorry.

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Registration:
1 - Chandler & Faz
2 - Buchert & MikeHo
3 - JW & John
4 - Dave & Darren
5 - Robbie & Katie
6 - Gary & Tall Mike

Can't Play:
Geoff, Gorecki, Brendan, Greg

Thursday, September 14, 2017

Spring 2018 - Season Schedule Preview

Hey kids! The off-season is dragging and we're only a few weeks in! We'll be doing some team events soon... starting in October after I do the marriage thing and have more time. But I'll go ahead and post the Spring schedule below. We're going to start up the week after MLK weekend.

Week 1 - Jan 21st - The Classic
Bye Week - Jan 28th - Gasparilla
Week 2 - Feb 4th - Skins Game (Super Bowl Sunday... party at Geoff's?)
Week 3 - Feb 11th - DPT Open (Major)
Bye Week - Feb 18th
Week 4 - Feb 25th - Hangover
Week 5 - Mar 4th - Match Play
Bye Week - Mar 11th
Week 6 - Mar 18th - DPT Champ (Major)
Week 7 -Mar 25th - Jamaican
Bye Week - Apr 1 - Easter
Week 8 - Apr 8th - Memorial (Countryway then Masters party at Gary's)
Week 9 - Apr 15th - DPT Masters (Major)
Makeup Week - Apr 22nd
Makeup Week - Apr 29th
Makeup Week - May 6th

Lots of breaks so plan your WAG trips accordingly!

The Summer schedule is 90% completed, but waiting to finalize based on a group trip that might affect a bunch of members.

Sunday, September 10, 2017

Grow the Game - Part 2: The USGA's Efforts

The USGA governs all things golf in the US and Mexico, and works with the R&A in implementing rules and regulations. Their sole mission is to protect, serve and grow the game. No sport has, and needs, as much coddling as golf. And yet we're constantly told the industry is dying. Jack couldn't save it... Tiger couldn't save it... technology is probably ruining it. Yet the cries to "grow the game" continue.

The USGA has implemented a few things worthy of praise: "Drive, Chip and Putt," The First Tee, and helping bring back Olympic Golf. Other initiatives have good intentions but are an uphill battle, such as "Tee it Forward*" and "While We're Young.**" A few were just mind-blowingly stupid, like suggesting larger holes and FootGolf. And yet, they aren't doing the one thing they were founded to do: promote the formation of clubs.

For the longest time there were two types of recognized golf clubs:

Type 1 - Located at a single specific golf course with a valid USGA Course Rating and USGA Slope Rating where a majority of the club's events are played and the club's scoring records reside.

Type 2 - Members are affiliated or known to one another via a business, fraternal, ethnic or social organization. The majority of the club members have an affiliation prior to organizing the club.

You can imagine Type 1 is the main priority, as the USGA is routinely involved in course ratings and promotion of membership to these clubs, which then funnel money back to the USGA (through GHIN and other licensing fees). Eventually as the internet grew, there was a need for a Type 3 club, despite it getting away from the notion that clubs should be close-knit for handicap peer review purposes.

Type 3 - Members have no prior affiliation and a majority of the recruiting and sign-up of the membership is done by solicitation to the general public (e.g., Internet, newspaper).

These clubs still must adhere to specific rules, such as requiring members to play a certain number of rounds per year together. But it's literally not enforceable. You can get a handicap on USHandicap, and NEVER play a round with another member of your specific club (ie: Tampa Area #612).

In my opinion, Type 2 clubs (that's us) are completely ignored and underutilized. I went through the list of approved clubs in Florida, and only found three other Type 2 clubs that had an active website. And with a cap of 24 members, we are the most exclusive Type 2 golf club in the state of Florida.

But why are there so few of these clubs still "active" in the state? Our members were playing about 5 rounds a year prior to joining, and now they play 25+ on average (just based on what's reported to me so the number is actually higher). A 500% increase is worth looking into! Bringing golf to young kids and people in regions that don't historically play is important. But if you want to reverse the decline in participation, then target golfers who already play but only do so a few times a year. The best way to do that is promote the formation of Type 2 clubs.

The USGA has money. They should be developing tools for club management and league play. And they should change the perception that joining a physical club (Type 1) is your only option.

The next, and probably final, installment of this rant will list out the minimum specs for a good league management app.


* Our league plays a "base" tee box of 6,103 (on average). Last season, people who played the base tees shot an average net score of +0.8 (not including Gorecki or Katie for various reasons). Those that played back shot a net average of +2.2!

** Arnold Palmer was featured in the "While We're Young" commercials. He literally died before the USGA ever put a dent into the pace of play issue.

Wednesday, August 30, 2017

Grow the Game - Part 1

A couple of months ago, I attempted to get some thoughts down on paper, mainly about our league and the success it's had in increasing play and excitement for our members. That evolved into an op-ed about how we need new technology to help duplicate our results. When I was finished, I wasn't sure what to do with it, so I sent it off to Alan Shipnuck of GOLF.com. He replied it was interesting but couldn't really use it for a featured article. Fair enough.

Since I wasn't going to raise funding and create an app myself, I figured I might as well see if an established company could use our formula. I picked 18Birdies since they are aggressively marketing a social app to younger golfers. Their GPS is pretty solid, but they unfortunately charge for anything and everything they deem as "premium." No matter... maybe they could add a league feature... which will get the ball rolling causing other companies to drive competition.

The founder and CEO immediately responded and set me up an hour interview with two of their top product development people. It was a good conversation, and they're allegedly building a league feature. But they're also in the business of making money, and the last question to me was: "how much would you pay for an app if it managed your league the way you currently do?" That answer is "nothing." But OTHER people out there might... so I hope they succeed.

Anyway... here's the original email I sent and I'll follow up later with more commentary as soon as I stop moving.

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Ever since forming a small local golf league six years ago, I've been bothered by a relatively unknown problem in the recreational golf industry. "Type 2" golf clubs, where members have an affiliation prior to organizing, are largely ignored and underutilized. In January of 2018, the USGA will end the Handicap Licensing Program, taking all Handicap Index calculations in-house and forcing clubs to do one of two things: join an authorized golf association, or figure out how to submit scores to the USGA computation platform. This decision will put an unnecessary financial strain on smaller Type 2 clubs who currently calculate handicaps on their own. While the governing bodies have no problem acknowledging barriers to entry, mainly time and money, they can't seem to stop increasing those factors.

We basically have the standard league options in our area: after-work 9-hole scrambles, weekend leagues requiring membership of a physical club/course, and regional options like Golf Channel's AmTour. None of these are viable choices for a small group of young adults working their way up corporate ladders and starting families. The obvious solution was to create a league which fit our schedule, location and budget. We used whatever application technology we could find (it was slim pickings back then), and modeled the season structure after the FedEx Cup points race (complete with "World Rankings" that qualify players for a Ryder Cup style event). We also went through the process of becoming USGA certified so we could calculate and provide Handicap Indexes at no cost to our members.
One thing we didn't expect was how much our average rounds per year would increase. Guys who played five rounds annually were now logging more than twenty. Despite only 18 official events, over half the league played 30 times last year. Non-avid golfers became hooked on practice rounds and continued to play during the off-season. Golf is addicting when people are given a reason to improve.
As mentioned, we attempted to incorporate technology to better our experience. Every member has their favorite GPS app, which usually includes some statistics tracking. We use a completely different app for a live leader board (one that's free), and we manage our tournaments and social community on an outdated blog service. Due to our small size, the system works perfectly and we have complete control. But our method isn't scalable and other groups couldn't mimic our success without being committed to the tedious process of league management. The desire for league play exists everywhere, but technology has yet to seamlessly combine all the features without increasing the overall cost of the game.
Finding a course can also be a nightmare. Part of the allure of forming an official club is to negotiate discounted group rates. But we constantly jump through hoops to get accurate information. We check multiple sources for details on availability, conditions, greens fees and even up-to-date scorecards. Calling courses usually results in bad information from disinterested assistant professionals or phone-tag with underappreciated directors of golf. The bottom line is most courses do not feel regular updates to their website are worth the effort. And they often don't see much value in a one-time discount for a traveling league. But what if they could use those discounts to specifically target other local groups throughout the year?

Solving golf's "grow the game" issue is easy and doesn't involve making the hole larger. Build technology for creating, managing and growing groups who fit the USGA's "Type 2" definition. If these groups can be convinced to use one singular social platform, you could also incorporate a way for golf courses to use the same platform to fill open tee times. The course could instantly view all planned tournaments in the area, the number of expected players, and then be able to reach out with discounted rates. Increased engagement with local groups would also force transparency, especially with maintenance schedules and course conditions.
Millennial golfers are not interested in paying yearly fees to play the same course over and over. We like variety and competition among a smaller subset of friends. And we will ultimately migrate en masse to the first application that truly enhances our social golfing experience. One that allows the creation of groups and leagues, live scoring, GPS shot tracking, and a direct line of communication to local courses. Features that are completely free and monetized only by the $70+ billion golf industry's advertisements. An industry that has vast room for growth once we give new and casual golfers an addicting reason to get outside and play more rounds.

Friday, August 25, 2017

Dub's Rapture Rankings Update

Now that we've played another Rapture, this one with actual money exchanging hands, it's time to update the DRR's. Here were the previous rankings, just to jog your memory:


Using the same methodology with this year's results, we have the new rankings as follows:


As you can see, Katie is still getting too many strokes and being on the winning team has a huge impact on money efficiency. Also, being really bad at these events, like Darren, for example, hinders your ranking. So does not going after losing a couple times, like Faz. Even cool hats won't save you.

I also sorted it via the individual money efficiency to weed out those who either inspire their team (typically me) or those that leach off the others (like Irish Dave), and I put together another chart that shows who contributes the most when their team wins.


Wow. Mike H and Greg were really freeloading on that one. You've got to at least bring one individual point home in these things. No wonder the teams were so even.

Everything is still pretty small sample size, but I hope it's at least a little educational. Faz, Dan, and Robbie, I hope y'all can make it next year and finally get your name on Moses.

Tuesday, August 22, 2017

Retrospective Draft Grades (and Captain Grades)

I'd like to stir up the pot a little more, so I figured I'd look back on the drama-filled Rapture draft in dreary Orlando almost a month ago. Draft rankings are indicative more of value for position than pure performance.

1. Irish Dave - D-

He opened with a huge upset loss to Gorecki and apparently didn't play well until the quarry holes. He avoids the F by earning an individual point and bringing his magic pen which surely helped his team in other ways.

2. Chandler - D

He organized the whole thing and teamed with Buchert to destroy the Katie/Darren alt shot team. The duff on 18 nearly earned him an F. His off course game was also severely lacking this year. He should have taken the Dub route and assisted in overserving Darren all weeking to take the easy Sunday win against Drippy. Hangover Darren is the worst golfer in the league.

3. Buchert - D

The first three picks combined for 2.5 points, of which Buchert only had 0.5. He's also afraid to express his true feelings to Big John.

4. Big John - A+

Big John never let his team lose an entire point and made awesome breakfasts. He almost won $40,000, too. He's got a lot of love to give (almost as much as whatever was coming out of his back), and maybe someday he and Greg will "bury the hatchet."

5. Greg - C

He managed to be on the winning team the first two days, but failed to take advantage of an old man in dire straits on Sunday. Losing the ugliest match of the weekend was tough, but he did it in a fabulous manner.

6. Reid - C-

I'm setting myself up to be berated with fat jokes, but Reid didn't have a great weekend on the course, regardless of his footwear. That said, he did get stuck with some tough matchups. John was playing lights out, Brendan was solid, and Katie got too many strokes on him. He still pulled out a half point with Gary despite being an underdog in every match.

7. Robbie - B

He started slow, but managed to help win two points for the grays with good rounds on Saturday and Sunday. Probably shouldn't get the blame for Chandler's bad round on Friday, either. Party Bear Robot (PBR?) was a good pickup at this point in the draft. Apparently he also shot up the dream foursome rankings over the weekend.

8. Tall Mike - B-

He came out on fire on Friday, but was well cooled off by the quarry on Sunday. Despite being the overwhelming favorite to win his singles match, he completely imploded off the tee on the home stretch. He did manage to make Gary antsy enough to want to blow the 3-foot putt to go home before the rain, and therefore gets a bump up to a B-.

9. Darren - A

He's kind of like fsu in that his greatest Rapture win was actually a tie. Instead of letting the Moses drip through his fingers, he bowed up and held on strong like a smoker to his pack of Marlboros. Good value pick here, like reds in hard packs at a good sale at 7-11.

10. Geoff - A

Getting 1.5 points this late in the draft is as solid as the chances that he'll wear a shirt embroidered with his company's logo. Check his taxes and make sure he's not writing them off illegally.

11. Dub - C

Dub's performance on Friday probably contributed to Buchert being off, and his concern about being paired with Gorecki in alt shot proved mostly unfounded. He managed to salvage the weekend with a great round after heeding Reid's advice to keep pressure on Mike to win an unfavorable matchup. Also, his shirt game was pretty strong, and not just in tensile strength (getting the fat joke in before Reid). Had he hit the four three footers he missed, this might have been an A.

12. Brendan - A


Contributed to two team wins in big ways. I didn't enjoy playing against him and Mike Ho on Saturday because they were killing it on the recovery shots. Brendan was sinking long putts all day. He did very little hunting of crocodiles, though, which was puzzling.

13. Mike H - A

Again, he played great with Brendan the one round I was with him. He said it many, many, many times, but put a wedge in his hand and he'll be on the green.

14. GOOOO!!!-recki - B

Not like Gary had a choice here, but it ended up working out WAY better than anyone would have thought 4 weeks ago. He played well on Friday to help the team to a win, and hit some big putts and was solid on Saturday. He had Dave on the ropes until the quarry on Sunday, too. All in all, the weekend was probably better for Mike than anyone else just to get confidence back. He still hates women, though.

Gary GPA - 2.06

Buchert was in talks for going 1-1, and Chandler is usually able to break 90, so at the time they seemed like good picks. Folks say that handicaps are overrated, but so are talented golfers, too. I'd take 10% off the grade for not showing up for the playoffs and picking an odd color, too.

Katie GPA - 2.63

She cheated on her draft by copying Big John's picks, but she proved a worthy captain in the end. And getting the first pick ended up paying off. Big John falling into her lap must have hurt, but it also helped her team immensely. Her skirt game was meh, but she persevered in the playoff and sealed the deal. I also like the tough of the ballmarkers to promote team unity. I hope championship coozies are on the way for her team.

I hope the blog stays active in the offseason. It'd be great to get Faz stats back someday. It'd also be great to get Faz back at a Rapture. That is, unless I'm 17th next year and need him to bail so I can play. I'll try to keep some content coming, and maybe finally get to that post about Brendan. My newest kid is supposed to be here in late November, so let's get in some golf before I'm grounded. Not on Florida football days, though.

Monday, August 21, 2017

2017 Rapture Recap

Great weekend up in Inverness. The houses worked out well, the courses were fun, and we only had a brief rain late Saturday. For the value, I think it was a phenomenal trip.

The actual golf, was a borderline disaster with many surprises.

Gorecki and Gary destroyed Dave and his Ho in Four-Ball. Nobody could believe it, and Gorecki won a ton of side-bet money with that point. Katie's team won the other three matches pretty easily, with only one of those involving some late round action (Greg learned to putt!).

Chapman was also a surprise, with Gary's team pulling back to within one point on the weekend. Once again, JW and Gorecki put up a great fight despite ultimately falling short. Gary and Reid fell apart at the end, barely hanging on to halve their match, which turned out to be critical to the Blue Team. The other matches were beat downs. Team Gray felt confident heading into singles.

The only thing shakier than this photo by Darren, was our golf game.

Gary's squad was able to make up that one point deficit, but it was ugly:

- Dave took care of Gorecki as expected.

- Robbie built a huge lead, only to lose the first four holes on the back nine and scraping out a win in the quarry.

- Katie won 4 holes in the quarry to stomp Reid.

- John shocked the world winning 3 holes in a row to close out Buchert.

- Gary finally took down Greg in a terrible match that saw both players in the high 90s (gross).

- Moostie fell apart in the quarry and lost to JW. He also almost killed everyone with lightning strikes, as he refused to pick-up despite putting 2+ balls into the water/rocks on every hole. I believe on 15 Mike made a nine, and my group had to watch every... painful... swing... and practice swing... and drop... and seriously I thought we were going to get struck by lightning. Pick up and move on!

- Geoff had the comeback of the week, winning 5 of 6 holes to bounce back from 3 down.

- Chandler and Darren played one of the worst matches of all time, shooting 95/101 (gross) to tie. However, Darren made two 7+ foot putts on 17 and 18 (with most of the league watching) to halve the match. Very clutch considering the amount of shit golf that was being played.

So for the first time ever we had a TIE. For some reason, we knew this was going to happen and we were prepared for a sudden death match between Gary and Katie. But despite our planning, Gary was checked out and NOT ready to play. Upon learning of the tie, he got frustrated and rushed through what was the worst playoff I've ever seen (somehow worse than the turd Darren and I laid on our final hole).

Katie lipped out a putt for bogey, giving Gary a chance to stay alive with a 3 foot double-bogey putt. This after a 30 yard hook found a bunker... which was blasted over the green... which was then chipped short... and then lagged 3 feet wide. The putt barely touched the hole as it slid by. Neither team knew how to react.

2017 Rapture Winners
Katie and the Blue cats won the 2017 Rapture! I hope everyone had a great time and enjoyed the courses. While our 2017 season is officially over, we're going to do a bunch of outings between now and January. Stay tuned and stay active!

Katie with The Moses!

Monday, August 14, 2017

Summer 2017 Season Handicaps

With another great season in the books, I thought it would be nice to put things in perspective and see who's improving and who's regressing - especially going into The Rapture.

Now that Chandler has posted Rapture handicap and stroke info, below will show how each players' handicap has changed from the beginning of this season to the end - with the 'Last Change' showing the latest handicap adjustment differential (8/1 - 8/15).

The Kitty Kats surely have a bold strategy going into the Rapture, dropping 5 stokes since 8/1.  Not a single player increased their handicap in that time. Looks like they prefer to go in hot rather than sandbag.

Although the Garyatrics have a hard time remembering the good ol' days when they used to light cats' tails on fire* just for fun, they sure haven't forgotten the cardinal rule of Rapture prep - don't lower your handicap right before the event!  As a team, they are +0.6 since 8/1. Whether intentional or not, we'll see if this kind of protectionism works out for them.

On the season, both teams dropped their handicaps by about 8 strokes!  With a league per person average of -0.9.  The number of people on each team increasing vs. decreasing their handicap, along with the sizes of those handicap changes, were relatively even between the two teams as well.  Should make for a good matchup.  

Be careful interpreting this as a who's hot, who's not, because while there is some validity to it (if you're shooting lower, you're getting better), the real question will be: can those that lowered their handicap keep up their high level of play?  And, of course, you should consider many of our 'better players' with lower handicaps will tend to be more consistent and therefore have less variance in their play and as a result, their handicaps.

Regardless, props to JW, Tall Mike, Chandler, Big John, Katie, Robbie, Reid, and Casey for dropping their handicaps between 2 and 5 strokes!  The average for those who lowered their handicaps was -2.8, while those who increased theirs, did so only by +0.8...okay, well +1.1 if you include Gorecki's +3.4 outlier.  Nice job to everyone as a whole, keep up the improvement - that is the goal anyway!

Oh...someone else also lowered theirs by -0.4 for the season..but I've been staring at this list for so long the names are beginning to blur together.  I'm sure I'll find it soon.


Summer 2017 Handicap Performance


*Disclaimer: DPT Golf league does not condone animal cruelty - Human cruelty in the form of constant berating, badgering, and ridicule of and by its members via commentary on this blog is condoned, if not encouraged.

2017 Rapture Handicaps

Here we go! Strokes in parenthesis:

Round 1 - Four Ball
(80% of course handicap, played off the lowest cap in each group)

Men - WHITE (70.4/130) ; Katie - RED (69.3/123)

Match 1 - Katie (11) / Greg (4) vs. Chandler (0) / Robbie (3)
Match 2 - Darren (4) / Tall Mike (5) vs. Buchert (0) / JW (7)
Match 3 - John (0) / Brendan (6) vs. Reid (1) / Geoff (9)
Match 4 - Dave (0) / Mike H. (2) vs. Gary (6) / Gorecki (18)

Round 2 - Chapman (Alt Shot)
(60% of course handicap for low cap, 40% for high cap. Played off the lowest team cap in each group)

Men - BLUE (68.2/117) ; Katie - RED (66.9/109)

Match 5 - Darren/Katie (8) vs. Chandler/Buchert (0)
Match 6 - John/Greg (0) vs. Gary/Reid (0)
Match 7 - Dave/Tall Mike (0) vs. Geoff/Robbie (6)
Match 8 - Brendan/Mike H. (0) vs. JW/Gorecki (10)

Round 3 - Singles
(80% of course handicap, played off the lowest cap in each match)

Men - DARK GRAY/GREEN (70.2/127) ; Katie - WHITE/SILVER (69.1/129)

Match 9 - Dave (0) vs. Gorecki (17)
Match 10 - Mike H. (0) vs. Robbie (3)
Match 11 - Katie (9) vs. Reid (0)
Match 12 - John (3) vs. Buchert (0)
Match 13 - Greg (1) vs. Gary (0)
Match 14 - Tall Mike (0) vs. JW (2)
Match 15 - Brendan (0) vs. Geoff (4)
Match 16 - Darren (5) vs. Chandler (0)

Rapture 2017 - Details

Here's the itinerary:

Thursday, August 17th - Check into AirBnB houses. Arrive any time after 4pm. I highly recommend everyone come up on Thursday. Doesn't matter if it's super late... it's better than driving to Juliette Falls for a 10am Friday tee time.

Friday, August 18th - Juliette Falls, 10am, Four Ball (Best Ball)

Saturday, August 19th - Candler Hills - 10:30am, Chapman (Modified Alternate Shot)

Sunday, August 20th - Black Diamond (Quarry) - 11am, Singles



Other info:

- The $160 you paid me covers room and gambling. Our new "pay for performance" structure will earn you $60 for winning The Rapture and $20 for every full point you secure for your team.

- Greens fees at these courses should be (after tax): $50, $45, $75.

- Juliette Falls greens fee includes a burger and a beer.

- Bring rain gear. We WILL be fighting rain all weekend, so be prepared to play in it and to wait out any lightning. Our Black Diamond tee time is the earliest non-member tee time allowed by the course.

- There's a decent sports bar in town called Coach's, about an 8 minute drive. Obviously you can bring food to cook in the house but I don't think they have grills. We really should just go out every night to make it easier.

House addresses:

House 1 (Chan, Gary, Darren, Katie, Greg, Robbie) - 1371 N. Timucuan Trail, Inverness, FL 34453

House 2 (Dave, Geoff, Reid, Gorecki, Mike H.) - 849 N. Sabal Palm Way, Inverness, FL 34453

House 3 (John, Buchert, JW, Brendan, Moostie) - 1281 N. Timucuan Trail, Inverness, FL 34453


Scorecards:

We are NOT playing split tees in this event. All guys are on the same set of tees. All Katies are on their own set of tees. Katie's tees were selected to be as close as possible in slope and rating to the men.

Juliette Falls: 

Men - WHITE ; Katie - RED



Candler Hills:

Men - BLUE ; Katie - RED



Black Diamond: (Everyone is playing a combo tee here. Look for the arrows!)

Men - Dark Gray/Green Combo ; Katie - White/Silver Combo



Information on handicaps for the event will be posted soon.

Jamaican Open - Summer 2017 Recap

Katie can't be stopped. Her team of Kitties dominated the leader board, finishing in the top 5 spots. While the Garyatrics struggled, perhaps they were protecting their handicaps for the Rapture?

Nope. We're just terrible.

Katie shot her second 89 (gross) this season, destroying 2nd place Darren by four strokes. It tied her best career round.

On the other side of the spectrum, Gorecki broke a streak of 70 holes in a row without a par... and actually made two on the round. Perhaps we've finally seen rock bottom? He also purchased two of the 4 pitchers he owed, so everyone in Virginia can stop protesting now.

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Excellent season by Casey, who is now the newest member of the Champions Club. He joins myself, Faz, Geoff, Darren, Tall Mike and Katie.

Casey apparently wasn't aware that there are two Champions Dinners a year. So to refresh everyone's memory... the most recent winner of a season gets $100 for dinner at a location of their choice, and is attended by all previous Champions. I guess we're eating in Pinellas!

The 7th member of The Champions Club.

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Tons of Rapture content to be posted later today. So stay tuned. Great season, everyone.

Wednesday, August 9, 2017

Rapture - Housing Change

When you coordinate group outings, it's always good practice to follow up a few weeks before the event to make sure everything is set up.

Using AirBnB, I booked us two 4-bedroom houses from a company with a pretty high rating and good reviews. Yesterday (9 days before the event) I emailed to confirm where to pick up the keys and whatnot.

I get an email back saying "there have been some changes" and the villas "no longer have availability."

While I understand this happens, why am I hearing about it a week before the event... and why am I only finding out because I initiated an email?

Anyway... we've now allegedly reserved three 3-bedroom houses (say that three times fast, Dave) in the same neighborhood. No change in price so it's technically a better "deal." But the roommate list has changed, and you are now grouped based on a combination of your Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, your horoscope, and divine intervention. All things I regularly track about every member.

House 1: "End Woman's Suffrage" - (1 king, 4 twins)
Chandler
Gary
Darren
Katie
Robbie
Greg

House 2 "Ex-Kickballers & Dave's Boy" - (1 queen, 4 twins)
Dave
Geoff
Reid
Mike H.
Gorecki

House 3 "UF/Growler Frat House" - (2 kings, 2 twins)
John
Buchert
Brendan
Tall Mike
JW

Hopefully this all works out and we aren't sleeping on the streets of Inverness. More details to come after we finish the season on Sunday.

Tuesday, August 8, 2017

Jamaican Open - Spring 2017 Re-do

Last event of the season. Playing Lakewood National, 9am tee time, $40. We are currently FULL. Give yourself plenty of time to get down there and check in.

Despite being fairly wide open, the course is rated (and plays) pretty difficult. Everyone is on the PALMER tees unless you tell me otherwise.


Moving to NATIONAL will increase your handicap by at least 2 strokes, and moving to ARNOLD will increase it by at least 4 strokes. The tees have color, but you can't tell by the scorecard (which is stupid). So count from the front (Palmer Tees are the 3rd from the front).

See you down there.


Wednesday, August 2, 2017

Modified Alternate Shot: Chapman Format Explained (for the millionth time)

The 2nd round of The Rapture is a Chapman format, aka: modified alternate shot.

Because we have new people, and Gary still doesn't understand how it works, let's try one last time with the help of MS Paint and some condescending sarcasm. And if you're still confused, here's another website attempting to explain the format.

ON EVERY HOLE, both players tee off. Both players then hit their partners ball. Then ONE ball is selected and you alternate until it is holed.

Let's look at a par 4, with John (black ball & black lines) and Greg (red ball & red lines).
 

Shot 1 - John hits his tee shot down the left side. Greg slices his tee shot into a fairway bunker.

Shot 2 - John now must hit Greg's ball, from the bunker, and uses his perfect hands to get it on the green! Great shot! Greg has an easier lie with John's ball, but shanks it into a greenside bunker. Greg loves bunkers!

AFTER SHOT 2 A DECISION MUST BE MADE!! Do they want to hit the third shot from the greenside bunker (John's original ball) or the green (Greg's original ball)?

Obviously, they're going to choose the ball on the green. At this point, it is TRUE ALTERNATE SHOT. Not a scramble. Not stroke play. Not some other made up format.

"But Chandler," you say, "how do we know who hits shot 3?!?" Simple. Whoever didn't hit the ball to that spot. So Greg is up!

Shot 3 - Greg putts past the hole.

Shot 4 - John taps in for a par. Splendid!

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I've successfully explained this to Gary about 15 times. He'll eventually nod and say he gets it... before scrunching up his face and saying: "OK so on a par 3, both tee off and then alternate shot in because they're on the green?" It never fails. NO! NOTHING IS DIFFERENT JUST BECAUSE THE PAR HAS CHANGED!

Let's review what happens on a par 3:



Shot 1 - John hits it on the green. Wonderful! Greg hits his ball on the back of the green. They have two shots at birdie coming up!

Shot 2 - Greg putts John's ball, and hammers it past the hole. John putts Greg's ball, and comes up slightly short.

OK, everyone has hit twice. That must mean: DECISION TIME!! Do they want the ball closer to the hole, or the one further away?!? They guess correctly and choose the closer ball (Greg's original red ball). Since John just putt it, Greg gets to tap it in.

Shot 3 - Greg taps in for a par. Unbelievable.

But wait! "What if one of the tee shots doesn't land on the green. Do you still hit each other's balls for shot 2?" I've been asked that before. I'll let you figure it out.

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Here's another question I received in 2017: "So on a par 5, you both tee off, both hit second shots, both switch back and hit third shots, and then choose because a par 5 is one more than a par 4?!?"

NO! After shot two, one ball needs to go in a pocket. 



Shot 1 - John hits a weak drive up the left side. Greg hits a bomb up the right side.

Shot 2 - Greg blasts John's original ball up near the green. John hits a weak 2nd shot with Greg's original ball.

HOLY SHIT! IT'S DECISION TIME!

They choose the one closer to the green: John's black ball. Because Greg just hit it, it's now John's turn!

Shot 3 - John chips on the green.

Shot 4 - Greg misses the birdie putt long, because he's not a great putter.

Shot 5 - John makes the comeback for a par. These guys are a wonderful team!

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Now for an honestly good question. "What happens if you go OB." First... that ball probably won't be used. But if John goes OB off the tee, then Greg needs to hit John's ball... but from the tee (and technically that ball is now being hit for 3).

If they both go OB, then they're both hitting again from the tee for 3. After that they pick the best shot and alternate. I trust you all can figure out how it works.

Tuesday, August 1, 2017

Week 9 - Jamaican Open (Make-Up)

We're booked at Lakewood National for Sunday, August 13th at 9:30am. Got us a $40 green fee which includes range balls. I had to promise we'd bring 16 people... so update your RSVP so I can fill any open spots.

Lakewood National opened this year in January, and was one of the final courses built by Arnold Palmer's company before he died. It's pretty wide open and a really good layout. Reminded me of Champions Gate Country Club.

Anyway, update your stuff and I'll see you in two weeks.

Monday, July 31, 2017

2017 Rapture - Drafts and Information

The Rapture draft happened yesterday after our round, and it produced a few interesting match-ups. First, let's review the draft:

Not a ton of big surprises, especially with Katie selecting Dave #1 overall. Gary changed his mind at the last minute and took Buchert with his 2nd choice, instead of Big John. Skill-wise, it's definitely the correct decision... as Buchert probably should have gone #2 overall. Interesting that Katie took Greg over Robbie at the 5th spot. Both are solid picks, but she definitely took length over girth. JW slipped a little low, so if he plays well he could be the steal of the draft.

Katie is the blue team. Gary is the gray team.

1 - Dave
2 - Chandler
3 - Buchert
4 - Big John
5 - Greg
6 - Reid
7 - Robbie
8 - Tall Mike
9 - Darren
10 - Geoff
11 - JW
12 - Brendan
13 - Mike H.
14 - Gorecki

We also made the match-ups for EACH day. Every year someone asks why we do this in advance, when it might be more "interesting" to make pairings the day before each event. In our first two years we did it the day before... but last year I required captains to make ALL pairings early. The reason is logistics of our leader board system. It's basically too tedious to create and adjust handicaps on the fly, and requires someone to bring a laptop with internet connection assuming it's available (you never know in these accommodations). I also don't really think you need to wait until the last minute. That sort of over-thinking is necessary.

So here are the match-ups:

Day 1 (Four Ball aka: Best Ball)
Katie/Greg vs. Chandler/Robbie
Darren/Tall Mike vs. Buchert/JW
John/Brendan vs. Reid/Geoff
Dave/Mike H. vs. Gary/Gorecki

Day 2 (Chapman aka: Modified Alt-Shot aka: Not a Scramble)
Katie/Darren vs. Chandler/Buchert
Greg/John vs. Gary/Reid
Tall Mike/Dave vs. Robbie/Geoff
Mike H./Brendan vs. JW/Gorecki

Day 3 (Singles aka: Individual Match Play)
Dave vs. Gorecki
Mike H. vs. Robbie
Katie vs. Reid
John vs. Buchert
Greg vs. Gary
Tall Mike vs. JW
Brendan vs. Geoff
Darren vs. Chandler

As always, links to this Rapture and previous events are located on the blog. There is one more handicap revision before we go, so I'll update official handicaps at that time.
-----------------------------------------

I'll be following up with the AirBnb houses soon... but we are NOT staying together as teams this year. Instead, your housemates have been "randomly" pre-selected. If anyone owns an air mattress that they enjoy, I recommend bringing it just in case. You may find yourself sleeping near Darren or Dave, and decide it's quieter on the floor in the bathroom.

House 1
Gary, Chandler, Darren, Katie, Greg, Robbie, John, Reid

House 2
Dave, JW, Buchert, Tall Mike, Brendan, Geoff, Gorecki, Mike H.

If you don't like someone in your house... then be sure to loudly, publicly, and drunkenly proclaim it every chance you get during The Rapture. There is definitely an "airing of grievances" component to the event.

Stay tuned for more information. Start making your predictions now!

DPT Masters - Summer 2017 Recap

We were all surprised to get through yesterday's round without any serious rain, and any stoppage in play. The Palmer Course was in great shape, and turned out to be a fairly easy test for most of the field. Lots of people under par (net).

But Casey played lights out, shooting -11 (net) and winning the season with one event to go. He picked up his 2nd win and first Major. In his last 5 events, he has two 2nds and two wins. Excellent playing! Welcome to the Champions Club, Casey.

Dave and Anthony also put up stellar rounds, tying for 2nd place. And on the other end of the spectrum, Gorecki tied his buddy Steve P. for the worst net score ever recorded at +26.

While there isn't anything left to play for in the season, you can still increase your league stats and win some cash at our final event. The Jamaican Open will be rescheduled for August 13th, at a course I'll announce soon. See you all then!

Updates Coming

Lots of stuff to talk about... so check back often today. First thing:

Our final event will probably be on August 13th. Let's take a week off to let the city dry out from all the rain, and this random tropical storm that popped up today.

If anyone need to be put on the deadbeat list from yesterday... let me know. I wrote down a few things but then I know some of you paid that off before leaving.

Friday, July 28, 2017

STD (Season to Date) Stats

I've printed these out in the past for drafts but I'm concerned about our planet so I'm going paperless this year. These stats are from this season's 7 events and only include league members that are part of the draft. Gorecki's WD is not included, which is really something because those 9 holes would make his numbers even worse. As always, these need to be taken with a grain of salt because not everyone has played in all 7 events. They can still give you a decent idea of recent form.

Number of events:
7 - Chandler & Gary
6 - Mike, Gorecki, Reid, Darren, JW, Brendan
5 - Geoff & John
4 - Katie, Dave, Brian

Points per Event
1. Katie: 171.250
2. Geoff: 147.500
3. Chandler: 143.571
4. Reid: 138.050
5. Gary: 136.300
6. Mike: 101.933
7. Brendan: 92.500
8. Darren: 78.333
9. JW: 55.550
10. John: 55.000
11. Brian: 40.000
12. Dave: 31.650
13. Gorecki: 2.500

Gross Strokes Over Par
1. Chandler: 11.571
2. Gary: 15.714
3. Dave: 16.250
4. Reid: 19.833
5. Darren: 20.500
6. Brian: 21.250
7. John: 22.600
8. Brendan: 24.333
9. Mike: 25.667
10. Katie: 26.250
11. Geoff: 28.400
12. JW: 30.000
13. Gorecki: 35.833

Net Strokes Over Par
1. Katie: (2.250)
2. Chandler: (1.286)
3. Brendan: 1.333
4. Reid: 1.500
5. Gary: 2.143
T6. Mike: 2.333
T6. JW: 2.333
8. Geoff: 2.400
9. Darren: 2.500
10. John: 3.400
11. Dave: 7.250
12. Brian: 8.000
13. Gorecki: 9.833

Pars or Better
1. Chandler: 52.381%
2. Gary: 46.032%
3. Dave: 43.056%
4. Brian: 33.333%
5. John: 31.111%
6. Reid: 29.630%
7. Mike: 27.778%
8. Brendan: 22.222%
9. Katie: 20.833%
10. Darren: 20.370%
11. JW: 17.593%
12. Geoff: 16.667%
13. Gorecki: 9.259%

Bogies
1. Darren: 52.778%
2. Brendan: 40.741%
3. Reid: 38.889%
4. Geoff: 36.667%
5. John: 35.556%
T6. Dave: 34.722%
T6. Brian: 34.722%
8. JW: 34.259%
9. Katie: 33.333%
10. Mike: 32.407%
T11. Chandler: 30.952%
T11. Gary: 30.952%
13. Gorecki: 25.000%

Others (Doubles or worse)
1. Chandler: 16.667%
2. Dave: 22.222%
3. Gary: 23.016%
4. Darren: 26.852%
5. Reid: 31.481%
6. Brian: 31.944%
7. John: 33.333%
8. Brendan: 37.037%
9. Mike: 39.815%
10. Katie: 45.833%
11. Geoff: 46.667%
12. JW: 48.148%
13. Gorecki: 65.741%

Par 3 Scoring Average
T1. Gary: 3.750
T1. Reid: 3.750
3. John: 3.800
4. Chandler: 3.821
5. Mike: 4.000
6. Brendan: 4.042
7. Geoff: 4.050
8. Brian: 4.063
9. Katie: 4.125
10. Darren: 4.167
11. Dave: 4.250
12. JW: 4.500
13. Gorecki: 5.083

Par 4 Scoring Average
1. Chandler: 4.681
2. Dave: 4.805
3. Gary: 4.875
4. John: 5.173
5. Darren: 5.258
6. Reid: 5.274
7. Brendan: 5.410
8. Brian: 5.488
9. Mike: 5.548
10. JW: 5.645
11. Geoff: 5.712
12. Katie: 5.829
13. Gorecki: 5.968

Par 5 Scoring Average
1. Chandler: 5.346
2. Brian: 5.467
3. Darren: 5.773
T4. Dave: 5.800
T4. Katie: 5.800
T6. Reid: 6.000
T6. Gary: 6.000
8. Brendan: 6.522
9. Mike: 6.545
10. Geoff: 6.778
11. JW: 6.909
12. Gorecki: 6.955
13. John: 7.000

Rapture Mock Draft - Chandler's Picks

I attempted to make this a comment on JW's mock draft... because I didn't want to push his down the blog. It's way funnier than mine, despite my effort to not mail this in. However, Blogger now has a 4,096 character limit on comments, which I swear didn't exist back in the day. Fuck it... new post it is. Sorry, Dub.

JW's picks are pretty accurate. However, maybe not in that exact order. So here we go, with much less entertaining commentary:

1-1 Katie's Kushy Kine Buds - Dave Harrington
Best all around golfer in the league, so Katie makes her first selection with her head, and not her other parts. Dave has the most points in Rapture history, as well as the best point % for those playing more than one event. And keeping in line with Katie's theme, Dave loves plants. Specifically trees.

1-2 The Garyatrics - John Webermeier
John has the best hands in the league. Strong off the tee, yet soft and gentle around the greens. His handicap has plummeted about 8 strokes this calendar year alone, so John's dominance is coming to an end. But he's really shaved off the number of terrible shots per round, which makes him a valuable Rapture teammate.

2-1 The Garyatrics  - Chandler Brown
Probably a Jack Reacher in this spot, as Chandler was the #1 overall pick last year and proceeded to only score one point (still 29% of the team's total). On the plus side, Chandler should be able prevent Gary from playing some modified scramble format in Round 2. But this pick runs the risk of Chandler getting drunk, and giving a sermon to Gorecki (an inevitable teammate) about how he's not going to get into Heaven because he cheats at golf and can't count. Fighting the Good Fight may lead to team dysfunction... but are you not entertained?

2-2 Katie's Kushy Kine Buds - Robbie Wilson
Party Bear is a homer pick for Katie. But it's not a bad selection, as Robbie destroys the ball and his short game is solid. Handicaps are overrated in The Rapture, so no need to worry about the slightly skewed index. Mr. Wilson (who honestly should be using Wilson clubs and balls) is going to score some points.

3-1 Katie's Kushy Kine Buds - Brian Buchert
Buchert only metaphorically falls into Katie's lap in Round 2, but she'll jump at the opportunity to have another all around good golfer on her team. Brian's downside is he might unexpectedly change from the stoic Perry Mason to the disheveled Saul Goodman at night. Definitely worth the risk, and he would have been picked one spot earlier if not for Katie attempting to quell WAGs fears.

3-2 The Garyatrics  - Greg Gleason
At this point, Gary's team lacks firepower. And Katie's team has 4 of the longest hitters in the event (including herself from the Red tees... which is going to be deadly on alternate shot). Gary desperately needs a bomber, and Greg is the longest still available. Sure, he's wild off the tee at times, but he really won't need to hit driver. As long as he stays away from the poison ivy, he's a good value.

4-1 The Garyatrics  - Robert Reid
Much like the previous selection, Gary is going with length over girth. We all know Reid has the ability to manufacture clubhead speed. But can he keep the ball on the course? And can he play smart golf on the shorter holes? Reid posted a legit 76 on the Old Course at St. Andrews, while playing with Gorecki. So perhaps he can skype his caddie and recreate some of that magic. "Finish the swing."

4-2 Katie's Kushy Kine Buds - Mike Oostenbrink
Let's review Katie's current Buds: drunken Irishman, Party Bear, Beau-chert... might as well add the ultimate Wild Card: Tall Moostie. Nobody knows what kind of golfer he'll be, and he scored 1, 2 and 1 points in the first three Raptures. But he has pills so he belongs on this team.

5-1 Katie's Kushy Kine Buds - JW Ferguson
Katie falls for JW's hype, about himself, and how he's never lost The Rapture. But honestly, he's a solid pick in this spot based on his play since Scotland Golf Camp. Dub is improving at a rate that should make him competitive for the DPT Cup in 2018... only to be derailed by childbirth later this year. He'll make the most of the weekend and play well, knowing life is about to get shitty. Literally. Since he's gonna change a lot of diapers.

5-2 The Garyatrics  - Darren Broom
Gary will consider this the steal of the draft, but that might be a false memory. Darren suffers from "The Drip." He also has a sweating problem. And The Baron has turned into The Barren as he hasn't won an event since April of 2016. His Rapture record sucks as well. If Darren wants to turn things around, he first needs to memorize the location of the bathrooms in the rental house.

6-1 The Garyatrics  - Geoff Leighly
Geoff might actually be a steal in this spot. A good Rapture record, and he recently won a league event. His handicap has started to drop for the first time ever, so he's improving. You always know what you're getting with Geoff. And sometimes that's better than a Wild Card.

6-2 Katie's Kushy Kine Buds - Brendan Donoghue
One of these days Brendan is going to have another -16 (net) performance. Ol' Double Chip has been better lately, so I assume his hat is giving him confidence. Whatever works. He'll probably score a point, which is on par with previous Raptures.

7-1 Katie's Kushy Kine Buds - Mike Hauch
New Mike has been very busy lately, burying cash in his backyard so his girlfriend doesn't find it. Hopefully he remembers all the secret locations, because there's 20 days remaining and he's the only deadbeat. But assuming he pays, his handicap is too low for anyone to take him sooner. Doesn't mean he'll be a bust. I actually expect him to score at least two points (out of 3). But as the most unknown new guy, he slips to round 7.

7-2 The Garyatrics  - Mike Gorecki
Mr. Irrelevant has ghosted from the blog recently. His last post was in April, and his last comment was in June before the Scotland trip. He didn't even attempt to correct JW, by pointing out he was NOT the last pick in the first Rapture. Has he been busy installing pool pumps near OB markers? No... he's just lurking in the background assuming we will quit talking about him if he stays quiet. But the Good Fight doesn't work like that. Silence does not bring about change. Learning to correctly count to 10 brings about change.
Anyway, by the time we leave for Inverness, Gorecki's handicap index will be the highest in the league. He's played 117 holes at the time of this writing, and has 10 pars. Zero pars in his previous 47 holes! If Gorecki scores even a half point this year, Gary should consider that a huge victory.

Thursday, July 27, 2017

Rapture Mock Draft

Good afternoon fellow and aspiring DPT League Members! With the poor blog activity lately, I figured I'd throw a quick post together about my favorite league event: The Rapture. Since we have one of the best weekends of the year coming up in only three weeks and the draft coming up on Sunday, I thought I'd put together a mock draft to help Katie and Gary think through their picks.

It'll be the only Rapture most of y'all will be chosen for since the majority of league members are heathens. Even if I didn't actually qualify for this one, at least I know I'll be good when Jesus comes back with his horses.

1-1 Katie's Boy Toys - Brian Buchert

Buchert sits tied with Geoff atop Dub's Rapture Rankings (DRR) and his team is undefeated in his three appearances. Although prone to spilling Gatorade on couches and/or bleeding from the head, Brian is a solid first pick. Mostly, though, Katie just wants to make sure he'll be riding in her cart all weekend.

1-2 Gary's Glasses - John Webermeier 

Big John goes second so Gary can ensure no one tries to fight him when he inevitably does something untoward at the bar on Friday or Saturday night. The MVP of the Scotland trip, Big John will provide change in whichever currency you desire and has lots of stories about South Africa. Despite sitting low in the DRR, John's game is solid right now.

2-1 Gary's Glasses - Chandler Brown

After seeing the chemistry between the Goreckis and those magical rounds on the Old Course, Gary is going to try to recreate the father/son mojo with the Brown clan. Expect a ton of gimmes in the rounds these two play together, as it is the father's right to give 15 footers for par. I think that's the 15th rule of golf, but I'm not sure since only the Gorecki's snuck off to see them at Muirfield.

2-2 Katie's Boy Toys - David Harrington

Katie wants the long hitters on her team, even if Dave is playing well above his handicap right now. She also knows Dave will have plenty of snacks, Magner's, and sunscreen in case anyone else forgets.
3-1 Katie's Boy Toys - Greg Gleason 

More long hitters. It's like a train of them. The first unofficial league member to be taken, Greg has the ability to play up to the competition. He also has the ability to play like Gorecki and almost hit people. Katie's banking on the good parts of his game shining through in August.

3-2 Gary's Glasses - Darren Broom

Gary's going for consistency here: consistency of putts, approaches, and drips. Darren's game plays well until he runs out of cigarettes and the hangover hits Sunday morning. Sitting low in the DRR, this is more of a skill pick than a past performance pick. Gary must think he can match him up with a player that has attributes that mesh well with Drippy. Like owning a towel company.

4-1 Gary's Glasses - Geoff Leighly 

Speaking of consistency, Geoff's handicap is consistently high. I know this because I often have to say "I'm the worst player in the league other than Gorecki," but sometimes, now for example, I get to say the second worst because I sneak ahead of Geoff. Ranked atop the DRR, this is a solid pick. Perhaps he'll bring an extra towel and pair with Darren over the weekend? Also, Geoff is one of three players to never be on the losing team in this event.

4-2 Katie's Boy Toys - Robbie Wilson 

I'd been talking to Robbie about joining for some time now, but it was Katie that finally pushed him into the league. Robbie's handicap is pretty low right now, but he can put up scores as consistent as his haircut. Party Robot will be able to handle the rigors of the drinking regimen easily, too.

5-1 Katie's Boy Toys - Mike Oostenbrink

The last past champion off the board, Katie will be hoping Tall Mike can recapture his 2016 form. Tall Mike is in the middle of the pack in the DRR, although before he was a captain last year he performed pretty well in the event. He's clearly not a great leader with his team falling by the largest margin in event history last year.

5-2 Gary's Glasses - J.W. Ferguson, II

Gary would like his team's victory recorded with style, so he's picking his favorite blog contributor. He's probably also referenced the DRR and seen that this is an absolute steal this late in the draft. The only three time champion of the Rapture, Dub's the best teammate you can possibly have. Hell, he won alternate shot with Gorecki last year! Gorecki! Unfortunately for Gary, Dub's handicap has slipped a little too low to be truly valuable, but maybe he can scrap some shots and help a teammate win on one of the first two days.

6-1 Gary's Glasses - Robert Reid

By this point in the draft, Reid will be sulking in the corner because he hasn't been picked yet. He needs to know which color midriff shirt to buy and this delay is making him really antsy. Reid's best attribute for Gary's team will be his eyesight and ball hunting prowess since his captain can't see.

6-2 Katie's Boy Toys - Mike Hauch

Katie wants to bring some more youth to the team, so she's going uber-millenial with this pick, assuming he finally pays Chandler. With the second lowest handicap of the competition, Mike is going to need to make some big shots to win.

7-1 Katie's Boy Toys - hmmm.. who did I forget... OH!! Brendan Donoghue

I knew there would be 7 rounds and that Gorecki would go last, but I got this point and ran out of people. Then I remembered that new guy Brendan. Nice guy, and if we knew more about him I'm sure he'd have been picked higher.

7-2 Gary's Glasses - Mike Gorecki

Gorecki has gone last in every draft thus far, and it won't change this year. He'll surely be paired with Dub in alternate shot again, so maybe he can get one point this year. Gorecki's biggest weapon is his golf ball, which can hit people.

There you have it, folks. It'll be Katie, Buchert, Dave, Greg, Robbie, Tall Mike, Mike Ho, and Brendan against Gary, Big John, Chandler, Darren, Geoff, Dub, Reid, and Gorecki. Smart pick is Gary's team since he was wise enough to draft the only three time champ.

Feel free to duff some of your own picks. Looking forward to Sunday.

Sunday, July 23, 2017

Schedule Update

Pebble Creek was flooded as expected, but we were getting through the round just fine until the lightning hit. By then the additional 1 hour delay, along with more rain, didn't make playing feasible... especially with The Open on TV. It's only our 3rd rain-out in history, so thanks for everyone being patient and hanging out. The bar was quite enjoyable.

New Tampa courses are going to be off-limits from here on out during the summer seasons. It just doesn't make sense to play ANYWHERE up there when we are surrounded by better options that drain. Westchase area is in the same boat during the rainy months.

Next week will be a Major in Orlando (Reunion). Tee time is 10:20am, and fee is $70 after tax. Again... we are under contract, so if you bail you will probably be liable for the fee.

The time for backing out has long past. And the time for backing out of The Rapture on August 18th, 19th and 20th (Friday, Saturday, Sunday) has DEFINITELY past. Everyone committed to that back in March, over 4 months ago, and houses have been booked.

The plan is to play our final week (Jamaican Open) on Sunday, August 6th at a course TBD. Go fill out your availability on the registration form for the 6th and 13th. Based on the standings after next week, we will do our best to accommodate anyone still in the running for the DPT Cup.

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Rapture draft will still be held at Ale House after next week. The captains better be ready to draft AND order their players for ALL three rounds. We've done this before so there should be plenty of people there to help.

See you then, and hopefully it stops raining this week.

Wednesday, July 19, 2017

DPT Masters - July 30th - Reunion Resort Orlando

We are under contract, and I need to give a guaranteed number of players to Reunion this weekend. If anyone who says they're IN fails to show up, I could personally be charged your fee.

As of now, we have 15 members who are IN... 2 future members (Mike H and Robbie)... and 2 guests: Crum and Tony F. Austin (19 total). I'll send them the final number this weekend.

If you're going to bail, do so now.

If you bail the week of and I'm charged... you will find yourself on the deadbeat list with any future earnings deducted until debt is paid.


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We also need to draft for the Rapture. MOST of the league will be at Reunion, but obviously only the captains matter. Here are the two options:

1) Head to Ale House next to Reunion for lunch after our round and hold the draft there.

2) Meet up at a bar the first two weekends of August.

Again, the captains vote is all that matters, so hopefully they're able to have the draft after Reunion.

As for Rapture payments, only Reid and Mike H. are deadbeats. Get your $160 payments in!

Jamaican Open - Preview

Wagwan, piff tings.

We're headed back to Pebble Creek for the 5th time in league history. It's a very, very flawed course... and the 2nd most difficult in our history of courses played 3 or more times. Median NET score to par is a ghastly +5.5, with an average NET score of +7.5!

In 29 member rounds at Pebble Creek, only THREE have been under par net. Savage. Six have been pitchers!

I enjoy a good slaughter, so this should be a pretty fun leader board to watch.

Below is the scorecard. Everyone is on WHITE unless they tell me before Saturday. Keep in mind it's a par 71, so add 150-200 yards to the stated distance for an adjusted number.



Moving from WHITE to BLUE will give you at least 2 bonus strokes.

Remember to wear the correct color shirt. The prospective guys are exempt, but the rest of you have no excuse. Tee time is 9am, see you there.

Tuesday, July 18, 2017

Mailbag #2 - July 2017

JW spammed an unused social media account with questions, and Gary submitted his AFTER the last mailbag. So here's a bonus mailbag:


What are your options for dropping a ball after it goes into a YELLOW or a RED hazard? -Gary

This comes up once a year, and I'm guilty of getting these wrong. So let's revisit:

Regardless of the stake color, you're ALWAYS allowed to hit from the previous spot for one penalty stroke.

Regardless of the stake color, you're ALWAYS allowed to go where the ball last crossed the hazard, and drop as far back as you want keeping the entry point between you and the hole, with one penalty stroke.

RED stakes (lateral hazards) allow you to drop two club lengths from the point where it last crossed the hazard line. No closer to the hole. One stroke penalty.

Dropping along the "flight of the ball" is not a real thing! How the ball got into the hazard doesn't matter. Also, think about most red (lateral) hazards. Many of them are on the side, so you physically CAN'T drop further back while keeping the point of entry between you and the hole.

There's a 4th option allowing you to go to the other side of the hazard... but don't worry about that choice. It's rarely applicable.

YELLOW
(1) Re-hit from previous spot
(2) Hit from where ball crossed hazard, allowed to move back keeping that spot between you and hole

RED
(1) Re-hit from previous spot
(2) Hit from where ball crossed hazard, allowed to move back keeping that spot between you and hole
(3) Hit two club lengths from spot ball crossed hazard, no closer to hole
(4) Mysterious 4th option I don't want to get into, yet.

That's the list. The below diagram shows two balls going into a hazard on a par 3, with stars marking each point of entry. Appropriate places to drop are numbered, and correlate with the above lists.
 

You can see why option 2 doesn't make sense for the orange ball, especially if the hazard was a wooded area. Mysterious option 4 might work... if you can even get over there. When the pros choose this option it's a huge debacle and takes forever since their caddies don't have distances and they have to walk. Rarely happens.

When Tiger Woods cheated at the 2013 Masters 15th hole (and didn't get DQ'd for some reason), he combined options 1 and 2. Honestly, he probably just confused the rules. But he went back to the previous spot (1) and then moved back a couple of yards keeping that spot between him and the hole (2-ish). If he wanted to use option 2, he needed to keep the spot where the ball crossed the water between him and the hole, not his previous location.

Next mailbag I'll talk about unplayable lies and obstructions like cart paths. For now, just attempt to digest the above information so you can help others.

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These are from JW:

Why are you on Instagram?
Some redneck high school kid from NC named "Chandler Brown" used my email address to make an account. I kept deleting it, but he was able to sign back up each time. He loves hunting and would post deer pics and whatnot. So I reset his password and put up a ton of pro-PETA pics... like "Meat is Murder" kinda stuff. Somehow he was always able to recover the account without actually getting the password reset emails. Instagram is apparently NOT very secure. So this went on for awhile, and I kept posting weirder shit, and tagging his friends. He finally gave up and/or figured out his real email address.

Why not make it a league Instagram account?
We're not big enough for anyone to care. I did make a "league" twitter account so I could follow the haps on the PGA Tour. Faz convinced me it was worth it, and it's pretty dope. So it really has nothing to do with our league, but all of our posts are automatically uploaded there for the world to ignore.

What's your favorite color?
Blue. But I like my tees White.

Do you actually enjoy running this league?
Running the league is tedious at times and it feels like herding cats. But going back to just causal weekend games would suck. Leagues are the future.

Can you rank your favorite league members?
Like a "MySpace Top 10?" I am my favorite league member. The rest of you are OK, but some are more fun at bars than others. John was the MVP of the Scotland trip though.

Can you spell Tall Mike's last name without looking it up?
Oostenbrink. Typed it out way too many times. Should just start using "Moostie."

How many times do I have to jerk my putter before it starts working?
The proper amount of putter jerks requires trial and error, but clean it first. And be careful not to make your putter shaft raw. And if you jerk it a bunch of times and still miss the putt, question whether or not the jerking is necessary. Maybe switch your pre-shot routine to something a bit quicker.

Send me questions. These posts will continue until we get more diversified content from other league members.

Monday, July 17, 2017

The Memorial - Summer 2017 Recap

The Memorial is a time to... remember things. Like Brendan... I vaguely remember he's been in the league for awhile. And Faz... remember Faz? He showed up yesterday and played some great golf. Definitely a "turn back the clock" moment!

Although they tied for first, Brendan and Faz broke streaks of 27 and 22 tournaments without a victory. It was their 2nd and 12th win, respectively.

The course was in good shape, especially for this time of year. Challenging off the tee, as Casey and Gary struggled to keep the ball in the short stuff.

Casey did sneak into the points, which could prove huge in the final two weeks. We now have a log-jam in the standings, with about 6 guys (Geoff and up) realistically still in the running for the Cup. Anthony and Gorecki are officially eliminated, and Troy moves to Texas this weekend so he's out as well. Amazing season by him though, and we'll be holding a spot for his return in a year.

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This week is the Jamaican Open at Reid's home course: Pebble Creek. Tee time is 9am, and they don't have a range. Also, hope for dry conditions this week as Pebble can quickly turn into a cart path only mess.

As a reminder... you must wear Jamaican colors this weekend, or pay $2 to The Man (Reid). Green, black and/or yellow shirts.

I'll get the scorecard posted soon.


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The following photo from yesterday was submitted by JW for analysis. He hit a ball near OB, and proceeded to hit a provisional in accordance with our rules. This is a picture of his original tee shot:


JW's ball is circled in red. In order to determine if it was "IN" or "OUT," he first stood behind the nearest stake to his ball. He then glanced right, triangulating his position with a pool pump (pink lines). Seeing that Gorecki was hiding behind the pool pump, JW concluded this would not be the correct line. So he found the stake on the other side, and judged if his ball was to the right of the hypothetical line between those two points (black line). After consulting with Greg, it was determined to be OUT, and JW played his 4th shot from the provisional ball.

Excellent application of the rules by JW!

Thursday, July 13, 2017

Countryside Scorecard

Alright, party people. Here's the scorecard for The Memorial. I've played this course a few times, and it's not easy despite the ability to play it short. Especially if it's wet out there.

I imagine there will be a handful of people who want to move back to the Blue tees. So if you want to do so, LET ME KNOW ASAP!

Moving from Whites to Blues gets you at least 2 strokes (probably 3) and moving to Golds gets you at least 4 strokes.



Wednesday, July 12, 2017

Mailbag #1 - July 2017

Our first ever mailbag! I get a lot of questions each week, so I might as well share my answers to the league! Apparently my request for submissions was picked up on the internets, as I got a bunch of inquiries from non-members all over the globe. Let's get to it:

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Do I get free relief from an embedded ball in the rough? -Brendan

YES! DPT Rule P-10 allows this! However you can't be in a hazard, and you need to drop (not place) the ball after you remove it. You also can't clean it if you're in the rough. Just pull it out, drop it, and hit it.

I should note this is NOT an official rule of golf, per the USGA. It's a "local rule" for our club. The USGA only allows free relief in "closely-mown areas" like fairways, greens, tee boxes etc. The PGA Tour, however, allows free relief in the rough. And I adopted their version because conditions are soft most of the year in Florida. You guys need all the help you can get.

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If I hit my first tee shot OB, then I hit a second tee shot OB, and then I decide to drop near the 2nd OB ball, what shot am I hitting? Also, could I just decide NOT to hit a 2nd tee shot and just drop from the original OB ball? If so, what am I hitting? -Dave

Lots to digest here, David. Whenever you think your ball is OB, you should hit a provisional (Rule P-8). This applies to all shots, not just tee shots. If you fail to do so and discover your ball is OB, you CAN drop there if you want for a two stroke penalty (Rule P-8.1). Or you can go back and hit from the previous spot with a one stroke penalty.

Hitting two tee shots OB and then deciding to drop where the 2nd ball went OB... you're now hitting 6, and should probably just pick up for the max.

If you think your first ball is not OB, you COULD decide NOT to hit a 2nd tee shot. If you discover it actually is OB, you may drop and hit 4 from that spot. But anything that is KNOWN to be OB requires a provisional.

You NEVER get to take a one stroke penalty as if you went into a hazard or lake. OB is NOT a hazard or lake. Until the USGA says otherwise... OB is different. Gorecki has been struggling with this concept since 2012, and doesn't think "stroke and distance" is a real thing.

Oh... once you hit a provisional, you can't ignore it. So if your 2nd tee shot also goes OB, you don't get to say: "I'll just drop here hitting 4, forget about my provisional." That would make you a cheater. Because if you piped your 2nd ball down the fairway, you sure as shit would want to play it from there hitting 4.

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Which is the more Gorecki move: Owing a pitcher after only playing 9 holes or quitting early so he didn't end up owing 3 pitchers? -Geoff

Definitely owing one after 9 holes, since it was halfway to owing a 2nd. And his 64 on the front nine was really a 66, but Dave got tired of correcting his score and teaching him the rules, so he said: "Fuck it, just tell me what you want me to write down from here on." It takes a lot to get Dave flustered, but Tragic Mike figured out a way.

Leaving at the turn was also due to a work meeting that he was probably going to miss thanks to a 4.5 hour pace of play as the first group out.

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Before I hit my next shot, can you tell me if I'm hitting 5 or 6? -@PiCannon - via Twitter

Without a doubt... 6. In fact, make it 7 just to be safe. Now fire those cannons, before ze Germans get here!

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This guy in my league really annoys me. I can't stand his [voice/comments/face/etc...]. Would you ever boot him or at least make a rule that nobody with his birthday is allowed to be in the league? -Harry Hans, Wolfsburg, Germany - via Snapchat

Too late, ze Germans are here.

Greetings, Mr. Hans! Thanks for your question. You know a league has reached the next level when there are people who annoy you. On the PGA Tour, most players can't stand Bubba or Sabbatini... but it's part of the "spice of life" that is variety! I realize it's common practice for Germans to just boot whoever they dislike, but we can't really do that. I also wouldn't make arbitrary rules, completely void of structure, in order to purify our player pool. Mainly, I'm afraid the precedent would be later used against me since I'm pretty annoying (especially on the golf course)!

Nothing works better than social pressure, so if you really think action is required... publicly speak up. Don't expect your League F├╝hrer to fight your personal battles. I'm guessing he's already pretty outspoken and says the things most of your fellow members are afraid to say out loud. Be the change you want to see in your league!

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Hello DPT! First time reader, first time emailer! My ball was near the OB line. It might be considered "out," but one of the stakes fell down toward a house. Is the OB line where the stake used to be, or where the top of the stake now rests? Also, if both my playing partners agree it's OB, can I still make the case it's NOT out of bounds? What if I stare at the ball long enough scratching my head? And what about the white hose/PVC pipe running from a nearby pool? Since it's white... can't I say that's the actual OB marker and thus my ball is now playable? -DeathToAustrailianFaces@prodigy.net

Let's visualize what you're asking with the diagram below:



There are three lines on this image:
Black - The OB line as set up by the course.
Orange - The OB line you want to use, based on the top of a fallen stake.
Pink - The OB line using a pool pump... because... fuck logic.

While I understand you feel God finally did something positive in your life by knocking over a white OB stake... just stop wasting everyone's time. It shouldn't take your playing partners to determine if the ball is OB. But now that they've weighed in... respect the decision and move on.

OB markers are not moveable. You're not even allowed to move them in order to hit your ball. So if a marker fell over, and you can clearly determine where it was originally... that's the line. Stand it back up, and compare with the marker on the other side of your ball. Don't look at other white objects, don't make excuses, take the "stroke and distance" penalty and play better. The rules are cut and dry, and you're probably not good enough to care about a two stroke penalty.

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My playing partner can't count. He constantly gets his score wrong at the end of each hole, and then argues when I correct him. How would you fix this issue?  -@MrPotadoughHead - via Twitter

Everyone makes mistakes, so you don't want to jump to conclusions and assume cheating. When someone is having a bad day, perhaps they're so frustrated they forgot a chunked chip or incorrectly counted their "stroke and distance" penalty after hitting OB. But in order to protect the field and your league, you should 100% speak up and ask for a recount. If you know for certain they are wrong, just explain your case.

If YOU are the one being questioned, don't get angry and take it personally. Just recount your shots and come to a conclusion.

I always correct people when I think they're wrong. But once in awhile... I'm mistaken. It's really embarrassing to speak up and ultimately look like an asshole. However, if we don't police ourselves, then we'll turn into a dysfunctional league playing for old frozen sausages. Getting your score correct is the most important thing in golf, and also the easiest.

Now what if we had someone who constantly seemed to miscount? Our league has a double-par max, so you only have to count to 10. And if you have trouble counting to 10, or can't seem to remember how OB works... then only two things are possible: 1) you're cheating or 2) you're retarded developmentally disabled.

Conscious cheaters will be kicked out of the league. But retardation developmental disability needs a more delicate solution. The golfer in question would find that I'm "randomly" paired with them every week (and riding in their cart). We'd become really close friends, as I'd graciously offer to help search for every lost ball near OB. I'd also become very interested in their round, almost as if I was their biggest fan. At the end of every hole I'd eagerly await to see if the score they tell me matches what I witnessed. If it didn't, I'd let them know they're mistaken and see if they're able to discover the error.

If it's an innocent mistake, I imagine the frequency of wrong scores would quickly decline. However, if mistakes continue, I'd begin loudly proclaiming to the group that "------- is about to play his X shot!" before every swing. When we arrive at the green, I'd announce something like: "------- hit one off the tee, two into the woods, lost ball drop three, fourth back into the fairway, fifth on the green and now putting for six!" No need for the player in question to even count. Once I get tired of babysitting, we'll give the player one last chance until he gets booted.

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Who goes to a deeper circle of Hell? The golfer who cheats and lies about his score, or the one who won't shut up about himself during a round?  -A member who wishes to remain anonymous

What about people who don't sign their names on burn notices?

Anyway, it's been a long while since I've attempted to read Dante's Inferno. But let's see...

Golf cheaters and liars would be in the eighth circle (Malebolge), and in the tenth Bolgia with the Falsifiers. Within that Bolgia there are actually four categories of Falsifiers. We'd find said cheaters (ie: Lexi Thompson) in the fourth class of Perjurers. Everyone down there suffers from various diseases, rashes, fevers and are prone to randomly ripping each other apart.

Golfers who can't stop talking about themselves would be classified as committing the sin of pride. However, vanity and pride are curiously missing from Inferno. It's only implied that pride can lead to treachery, which would put you in the 9th circle, frozen in ice and within a pitching wedge of Satan.

So to answer your question, cheating and lying about golf puts you in a deeper circle of Hell. Vain and prideful golfers are just annoying and should be publicly shamed in order to bring about change.

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That's the end of our first mailbag! Keep your questions coming in and we'll do another one eventually!