2022 Rapture Recap

Golf trips — especially destination trips — are always going to have their hiccups. In 2019 we had torrential rain forcing us to change courses the morning of Four-Ball. We went to Orlando in 2020 during COVID, something that could only happen in our great state of Florida. And last year I got one of the tee times wrong... the first sign of impending dementia.

So when Hurricane Ian flooded Sebring, it shouldn't be a surprise we were able to quickly adapt and change the destination. We got lucky with the course and housing availability, but our Club's expertise in weather patterns and our extensive course database told us where to look.

 

The decision was Dunellon/Inverness in a repeat of 2017's Rapture, with Skyview subbing in for Black Diamond. That competition ended in our only tie, as Katie prevailed beating Gary with a double bogey on the first playoff hole. It was awful to watch, but quite memorable.

The story line this year was "Skill vs. Strokes." Never in the history of the Rapture have the teams been so lopsided in average and median Handicap Index. For years, Darren has been dying on the "strokes mean everything" hill. I'm personally not so sure about that, because we use 80% allowance (60%/40% in Chapman) which benefits skill. But if we were going to squash this debate, this was the year to do it.

The oddsmakers heavily favored Dave's Orange Crush team. As did the Juliette Falls bartenders and staff. They loved Team Orange, and found Team Green to be creepy and most likely to live in a beat-up white van without any back windows.

 

Definitely the team with diverse 401(k)s.

But an argument could be made that Orange's "skill" wasn't real. Maybe it was all vanity numbers. Half of them lowered their Index in the final revision. And with a major storm bearing down on Florida... you need sandbags!

 

Looks like Green's van picked up their first child!

Day 1 - Chapman

Candler Hills was a lot of fun. We were treated to a very solid lunch in the clubhouse, and the staff enjoyed our attendance. Despite being over-priced, it was perfect for modified alt-shot. No water hazards on the course, and very fast greens without flat areas. Even with a simple layout, it's disappointing how much better it is than courses in Tampa.

The matches were mostly predictable. Faz/Reid are a great Chapman team, especially receiving strokes. Melberg/Chandler had a slow start but ultimately got their shit together to run away with the back nine.

• I have to note that the Gypsy Voodoo Doll made an appearance, and Casey/Moostie immediately lost three of the next four holes. Seems the sage has worn off.

Gorecki/Danny put up a good fight, but ran out of strokes on the last five holes to complete the upset. Speaking of upsets... huge win for Gary/Troy over Dave/Travis. Something I didn't expect, and at the time felt like it could be an important point for Green.

Day 2 - Four-Ball

Juliette Falls is a great course, and refreshing to see run in a top-notch manner. It's affordable, great conditions, cart service on both nines, with a fun bar and restaurant. It's a shame it's so far from Tampa. I can see our Members requesting a return Rapture based on this course alone.

Anyway, Troy/Moostie waxed Ho/Darren — which I think everyone predicted. Danny sat in the cart for most of his match, which explains why he and Faz only won a single hole against Melberg/Brendan.

 

Reid/Gorecki were 3-down early and scrapped their way back to All Square... until some controversy about Gorecki missing a non-conceded one-footer. Arguments over gimmies in team match play warm my soul. And yes, Gorecki only missed the putt because they didn't give it to him.

Casey/Gary was pretty much just Casey — as Gary contributed on two holes, while Casey shot a 39 (gross) on the front. HOWEVER... Chandler (#1 pick overall and #1 in all our hearts) was only +4 (gross) through 16 holes. That allowed Geoff to masterfully make bogey (net par) on 17 to seal the victory.

At this point Orange was up 5 - 3. They were confident, but Rapture veterans know a two point lead going into Singles isn't much. In the 8 previous years, a team has earned 3+ net points in the final session four times. In other words, Singles tends to be a blow-out 50% of the time. But could Captain Troy's team smoke and stroke their way to glory? Proving Dave's team was filled with Beyond Meat and Impossible Handicaps... merely intimating "good" golfers?

Yes.

Day 3 - Singles 

Orange only needed 3.5 points to win (3 to tie). Green needed 5 points to force a playoff.

Early on (4-ish holes in), Green was leading 6-2. Only the first four matches were close: Geoff/Troy, Brendan/Gorecki, Chandler/Faz, Darren/Moostie. Three of those matches contained golfers of similar skill, and Gorecki was getting an embarrassing amount of strokes — so it made sense.

A few holes later, the other matches were completely lopsided:

• Dave led Danny 4 Up (thru 8) - Danny just wanted to be at the Juliette Falls bar.
• Travis led Gary 4 Up (thru 7) - To be expected. Gary's game is in a slump and he drank beer out of a shoe the day before.
• Reid led Melberg 4 Up (thru 8) - Somewhat shocking. Not that Reid couldn't win... but a blow-out of the 2nd best golfer in the Club?!
• Casey led Ho 5 Up (thru 8) - Wait... the best golfer in our Club is also getting spanked?!

At this point I was commenting to Faz how bullshit the whole situation was. A lot of the historical chokers (Geoff, Brendan, Gorecki, Chandler, Faz, Darren) went off early so we didn't have to decide the competition. And yet it seemed we'd soon be the only matches still on the course!

With Dave and Travis looking like winners, Orange needed one more point from those first four matches to force a playoff. Allowing the Captains to win the Moses on their own! 

 

Let's fast-forward through the 12th hole...

• Troy led Geoff 4 Up (thru 12) - Geoff turned into a putter on the hood of Troy's car. He gone.
• Gorecki led Brendan 4 Up (thru 12) - Chandler gave Brendan some pamphlets explaining how to cope with losing to Gorecki in Rapture Singles. I'd say it gets better... but it doesn't.
• Casey led Ho 6 Up (thru 12) - I bet you think this post is about you, don't you?
  
• Reid led Melberg 1 Up (thru 12) - Hang on! Orange has a new path to the Winner's Circle!
  
• Travis led Gary 3 Up (thru 12) - This is elder abuse. Just end it already.
  
• Dave led Danny 4 Up (thru 12) - Dave prolonging the match until the aliens arrive.
  
• Chandler/Faz & Darren/Moosite All Square (thru 12) - "God dammit! All eyes are going to be on our foursome down the stretch." -Chandler, multiple times
   

Every close match has a few crazy moments that define the outcome. Here's what I witnessed:

• Chandler took down Faz by making pars on 14 through 17. Faz had a tough break (tee shot unexpectedly going OB on 15)... but when the Par Train is rolling, it's wise to get off the tracks.
• Moostie made a natural 7 on the par-3 14th... to win the hole... and go 2 Up. Darren was mentally defeated at that point. Never mind that Darren chipped in for birdie on the next hole, only to be covered up by Moostie with a long putt for birdie. This is the Tall Mike we all love, and hate to play against.

Orange should have the three points needed to force a playoff. But some new shit had come to light behind my group:

• Melberg won 16 to go 1 Up, possibly giving Orange the Moses, as Reid didn't stroke on 17.
  
• Gary won four holes in a row to go 1 Up through 16 on Travis. There are no strokes left in this match. I'm told it was such an "out-of-this-world collapse," the aliens Dave summoned turned their ship around. They'd given up on saving humanity (again) due to Travis' mind-boggling course management. If humans can't hold a 4 Up lead on half-blind Gary, they are a doomed species. We're talking Topor levels of bad decisions. Not being able to give each other tips/advice was a huge detriment.

We watched as Travis and Gary traded pars on 17. Then Gary put his 2nd shot into the greenside lake on 18. Only for Travis to duff his approach, chunk a chip, and two-putt to match double bogeys. Green gets another point.

Reid and Melberg both had good looks at the 17th green. But Melberg pulls his approach short-left. He then makes a terrible chip that barely gets on the green. Leaves a putt short above the most tricked-up pin placement of the day. And ultimately records a double-bogey 6.

Meanwhile Reid goes long in two. Stubs a chip. Putts it a few feet short. Argues for a gimmie (allegedly he thought he was stroking). And finally sinks the putt for 5 to square the match. 

 

On to the final hole with the entire Rapture watching, and Reid getting a stroke. Melberg looked to be in a good spot off the tee, but again pulled his approach left. Reid's ball was long through the fairway and on a side-hill lie. But he finds the center of the green with a beautiful 2nd shot. It was all he needed to win his team the Moses outright.

Well deserved champions.

Did we settle the debate of strokes vs. skill? I don't think so. A two point victory was a nice change from recent blow-outs. Perhaps the handicap system just works. And it's most important to be in good form. And sometimes golf is random enough that the greatest golfer in Club history goes Ho-and-three.

A man who picks winners (and Danny).

It remains to be seen how this Rapture will affect future drafts. But the weekend was a blast. I hope you all enjoyed the laughs, debates, and competition. Good luck on your qualification to the 2023 event!

2022 Rapture Participants