Thursday, January 30, 2020

Match Play - Week 5

Big Cypress is having a large Canadian event (naturally) on February 9th so they couldn't get us out. Casey stepped in and got us on Countryside (Lake/Pine) for $45+ tax. We'll gladly take that rate this time of year.

However, he booked us 20 spots at 8:35am. Good for all of you who claim you "like early tee times." Bad for all of you who say that but in reality can't get your shit together before 9am.

Update your RSVPs... and tell me if you have a buddy who wants to join. We're going to have extra spots, and because it's Match Play I'll need to get creative with the groupings.

Monday, January 27, 2020

The Concussion - Spring 2020 Preview

Ya'll ready for some pitchers? Because we got 6 in the backlog an there will be a handful more "earned" on Sunday.

There's a lot of re-branding going on lately, and The Concussion is part of the evolution of our Club. Gone is the celebration of one's lack of accomplishments in life — and instead we pay tribute to our lack of skill in this game we commit so much time and money. Sure, most of you haven't officially hit someone in the face with a golf ball. But you're all capable of doing it.

We're headed to a "new" course for the Club — The Groves in Land O' Lakes. I previewed it awhile ago, and I'm excited to take us somewhere not named "Countryway" (since reviews of Freedom Fairways were mixed between you people). As a staunch defender of Countryway over the years, I'm definitely not trying to throw shade at the best grill in golf. But variety is incredibly important at our bi-annual Executive Course tournament.

So everyone is on the tips (Blue) except for Katie who is playing the ladies tips (White). Executive golf usually produces low Course Handicaps, and coupled with the new USGA calculation I'm expecting a bloodbath. Someone will put up a good score... but it's not going to be Mr. Driver (Casey). Leave that club in the car and replace it with a Square Strike.

Cost is $27-ish. Tee time is 10am. There is a driving range. And we are going out in order of standings the rest of the season. Only adjustments will be made for those of us with guests, keeping the order as close as possible.

Three of you are ???s, so update your status ASAP.

Also, if you've been playing golf lately outside of the Club... send in your scores!

Tuesday, January 21, 2020

FBGC Open - Spring 2020 Recap

Reid took advantage of the MLK Freedom Weekend bump to win his first ever Open Championship — making him the 3rd Member to complete the Grand Slam Devil's Triangle.

He attempted to choke away the victory with an untimely double on 17. But at that point Casey was already too far out of the running, and JW had thrown up all over himself (metaphorically) on 16 with a quadruple-bogey (his 2nd of the day).

It looks like most of us had at least one blow-up hole that ruined our day. Perhaps the light, but annoying, rain was the cause of poor play. The greens at SoHilly were at least in great shape, and fast. Overall we got really lucky with the weather and conditions, so that makes me feel a little better about their recent rate-hike.

Reid now sits atop the standings, and made some big moves in becoming a Rapture Captain.

---------------

I think the Deadbeat List is correct... I know the pitcher list is. So tell me if anything else needs to be added/removed.

---------------

We're off this week for Gasparilla. I'll hopefully get The Concussion booked soon.

Thursday, January 16, 2020

Course Handicap Calculator

I figured out how to fix the Handicap Calculator on the "Members" page of this blog.

You can now enter in ALL four fields to get your Course Handicap (100% allowance). Yes, it's a pain in the ass... but that's what the USGA is expecting us to do.

If you ever want to know how your handicap moves between tee-boxes... this is where I'm going to direct you.

Wednesday, January 15, 2020

Summer 2020 Schedule (Tentative)

Here's the Summer schedule... most of it is set in stone.



Couple of things to note:

1) Rapture is going to be pushed to September or October... the later the better... to help reduce the chance of rain and oppressive heat.

2) Every year we play on the British Open, we seem to regret it. So right now I have us taking the day off to party and watch morning golf. I might change my mind on this.

Tuesday, January 14, 2020

Skins Game - Spring 2020 Recap

Big John re-discovered his driver swing... for like the 15th time in his golfing career. Which was essential on a long, soft course like Dunedin GC. It also helps he carded 2 sandies, and didn't really have a blow-up until the final hole. This is John's 4th event in a row finishing in the top 4.

Faz ended up losing by one, despite putting well enough to win. There just wasn't room for a lot of mistakes out there, and a poor opening tee shot was apparently all it took.

Gary, like most of the league, had the wheels fall off on the back nine — slipping to 3rd but maintaining the top spot on the season leader board. Speaking of wheels falling of... shout-out to "Back Nine Geoff" for shooting 42 - 57.

Dunedin was as frustrating as I remembered... debuting at #3 on our course difficulty rankings. As everyone pointed out, it was a little disappointing the areas around the greens were in bad shape. Regardless, it's always nice to play something different. And hopefully we can continue to play some "new" places in 2020.

--------------------

Southern Hills this week. 10:30am tee time, and rate of about $70 after tax.

See you up there.

Monday, January 13, 2020

Boozer's Golf Review Volume 24 - Dunedin Golf Club

Good day, faithful BGR readers. We had a great day of golf Sunday at the Skins Game and a few FBGC members got some practice for the Hangover Invitational after celebrating January 11th a little too hard. Folks getting a little loose with the wine on Saturday led to some good Sunday scores. For a little bit, at least. As a winner of two Hangover Invitationals, I can tell you that high performance on the course for all 18 holes requires a delicate balance of cocktails throughout the day. Geoff attempted to sober up during the day. Bold strategy, Geoff. It appeared to be working until he teetered on 11 and completely fell off the beam on 14 and 15. So it goes. The BGR would have recommended picking up a few beers at the turn, par streak be damned. Hopefully this is a lesson learned for all of us.

You can't drink all day if you don't start in the morning

Dunedin Golf Club took full advantage of being a private club and was as ready to serve as Pat Tillman after 9/11 (RIP). Clubhouse was open in the morning and the cart lady was on the course. Promising start for the review. 

Thrifty Boozing Conditions

While I was pulling my clubs out of the truck, a guy dropped off a cart for me. Hello invitation to bring my own booze. I'm pretty sure I could have brought a dead hooker cooler out on the course, but I didn't try as I had only brought bag bourbon to mix with my iced coffee for the beginning of the round. Still, I think the warning signs about only being allowed to consume alcohol purchased from the course were the most protest you'd get about bringing your own. 

They served the usual suspects of domestics in 12 oz cans at 6 for $20. Typical golf course pricing, but probably worth bringing at least a few of your own instead of shelling out that cash once or twice. Cart pricing for liquor was $9 per mini bottle. At the turn, one group member ordered a double and was charged $13.50 in the clubhouse. On the course it was $18 for the same drink. The importance of bag bourbon has rarely been so apparent. Cokes were $2.50. 

On Course Service

While the carts didn't come with a cooler, the cart lady had some and that made the 6 pack purchases go down a little smoother. The lady got around the course quickly and ran the credit card immediately. She gave us the old "I just work here" when we told her about the discrepancy in liquor pricing between the course and the clubhouse, and honestly I admired that. She was pretty honest about her thoughts about how much the liquor is. I don't think I could have been more transparent in my intentions to drink my own booze when Brendan suggested buying just a coke instead of the two overpriced airplane bottles with the same liquid I already had in my golf bag, but the cart lady was more than happy to oblige. All in all, we had a good experience with the on course service. Perhaps she had a new lease on life after Dave almost killed her on the first hole, too.

Pissability

Not great. Some parts of the course were a lot friendlier than others, but most of the holes were on top of each other or alongside roadways and businesses. There were a couple bathrooms out there. One was around the 4th hole in a particularly cramped part of the course, too, so that assuages the lack of tucked away spots a bit. Still, better to not be overly hydrated out there.

Clubhouse Experience

In this season of the pitcher, one could probably do worse than a $13 pitcher after tax and tip. Probably would have been good if I could have gotten off the deadbeat list there instead of Southern Hills on Sunday, but such is life. Service was good despite the heavy crowd, and the food received decent reviews. Being so close to downtown Dunedin provides better hangout options, though. Recommended to skip the clubhouse post-round and go have fun elsewhere unless you want to settle for just okay.

Overall

Early service, ease of BYOB, and quick cart lady with coolers provide a solid foundation. Liquor pricing gives it a ding and a pedestrian clubhouse keeps it from maximizing potential. Pissability brings it down a bit more. We generally had a meh impression on the day, too. Overall, we'll split the 6-pack two ways and give them 3 ice cold beers. That'll be $10 plus tip. Just Venmo me.


FBGC Open

Apparently the economy is doing too well.

Southern Hills this weekend can't get us out until 1pm due to another outing. They also raised their guest rates to $70.

Gary called to complain and they went down to $65.

--------------

Southern Hills can now miraculously get us out at 10:30am on Sunday.

We should have a couple spots open.

MLK Golf

Got 8 spots open for the somewhat newly rebranded Moccasin Wallow Golf Club. 10am on Monday, January 20th

In so far:
Chandler
Gary
Faz
Reid
Geoff
Danny

Who else wants to join?

Thursday, January 9, 2020

Fort Brooke Golfers Club

The only thing more embarrassing than knowing the history of our now retired Club name, was trying to explain it (or some other made up story) to outsiders.

We're long overdue for a permanent change.

Back in December of 2018, I asked everyone for rebranding suggestions. The results were predictably terrible. We are not a Club of creatives — as confirmed by all the great #content that you people fail to provide (with obvious exception of the occasional BGR).

For a year I weighed the options, and decided it's time to just pull the trigger on something with a decent backstory. We couldn't go into 2020 with the Donkey looking over our shoulders.

My requirements were a Club name that is: unique, related to our location, official and legitimate sounding, not embarrassing to explain, and easily branded with a simple and recognizable logo.

Change is always going to be weird — at first. After re-naming our "Ryder Cup" event to the "Rapture," JW wasn't impressed. But it didn't take long for us to embrace it as the best golf weekend of the year. I'm truly going to miss The Moses when Gary finally wins him this year.

Anyway... last Board Meeting I informed everyone the decision was made: Fort Brooke Golfers Club.

What the Hell is Fort Brooke?

The simple answer is: Tampa. The entire American settlement of this area was due to Fort Brooke — a small outpost established after the US acquired Florida from Spain.

Colonel George Mercer Brooke was tasked with establishing a military presence in Tampa Bay to curtail illegal activity on the Gulf coast. The collection of buildings were constructed in 1824, and stretched from the current Tampa Convention Center all the way past the Amalie Arena.

1838 map of Fort Brooke

Fort Brooke boundary in blue & green. The 1852 town of Tampa in red.

During the Civil war, it was a small Confederate camp until eventually bombarded and captured by Union forces. And in the Reconstruction era, it served as a staging area for troops stationed down in Key West during Yellow Fever outbreaks.

Ultimately the fort was no longer needed and decommissioned in 1883 — lost forever to the expanding city of Tampa.

Ownership of the land itself was viciously contested in courts for 21 years, involving all the big names you'll find on our streets and neighborhoods: Henderson, Sparkman, McKay, Ybor, Chamberlain, etc.

The town of Tampa wanted it for schools and a public park, while others realized the value for industry. What we now know as Downtown Tampa began as one of the most convoluted stories I've ever come across, with various government agencies (both local and national) overturning previous decisions... until it reached the United States Supreme Court in 1904.

And in November of 2018, the new Water Street project was still uncovering graves from the various Fort Brooke cemeteries.

---------------------

There's nothing more distinguished than representing the heart and inception of our great city. So here's to many more years of the FBGC fortifying the region (we've been at this 9 years already!). With any luck, one day we might also have a physical clubhouse to call home.

Goodbye, DPT Donkey. And I'll see the rest of you jackasses on the course.





*We got our graphics guy working on the logo... at which point we'll get some official Members merch created.

Wednesday, January 8, 2020

Boozer's Golf Review Volume 23 - Lexington Oaks

Opening Day!! Everyone showed up early for this rather chilly event. Attendance was high and the BGR will take most of the credit for this after such a successful scouting round 4 weeks ago. Thank you to all that showed for our inaugural event. Course of the week is Lexington Oaks.

You can't drink all day if you don't start in the morning.

Lexington Oaks is pretty much a glorified muni, but somehow has a "membership" group which would insinuate it is private. This is a course that thinks of itself as private, but its almost a course you can call public. So I'm going to make a ruling on this right now. If you can't sell booze before the county allows it, then you aren't private. Stop selling punch cards to d'bags that own their own carts and realize you are the dump you are. Needless to say no early booze.

Thrifty boozing conditions

Despite its haughty nature Lexington Oaks is quite easy on the wallet. You could easily drive your cart out to the parking lot and load up a pony keg or purchase beers at the turn for $15 a 6 pack or buy pitchers in the clubhouse for $10. The BGR appreciates the thrifty boozing conditions perhaps more than any other course feature. We have yet to establish a "shot of the week" measure this season and Darren's boozing got the better of him before the season started so we have no reports on liquor costs.

On course service

Nearly every time I have played this course the cart girl roles up mid-swing on number one and walks around her cart like a carnival caller selling her wares:

                                "I have candy, sandwiches, shots, beers, Bloody Mary's..."

Today I was spared the annoyance, but was left dry on the course. There was no cart girl, there was no halfway house, there was nothing but tears and anger. I don't believe we have rated this course to date (Dear Leader please let me know if I am incorrect), but the ranking will be hindered by this.

Pissability

With this type of course, houses wall to wall, you would expect some difficulty, but avast I was able to potty at my convenience without any granny heckling or shy bladder issues. That's not to say they weren't watching, but no one seemed to care. There are pee stations about every 4 holes., but you must remember their infallible door code of "1-2-3-4" to get in.

Clubhouse experience

The Golden Oldies Mixed Doubles crowd teed off the back at 8:15 and weren't stuck behind Pasco's finest, like we were, all day, yet they still managed to take up 8 of the 12 tables in the clubhouse when we arrived at 1:45. This afforded "Did Reid Leave" Reid the excuse to bounce after some soccer talk with Adam, but allowed BGR member Brian Buchert to show some true brilliance by suggesting "lets just sit on the patio." The service was somewhat chaotic, yet I think everyone, except Gorecki, was pleased and most learned the need for second language. We managed to work off 8 of the record breaking, last season tying 13 pitchers earned today. I believe 5 of those were due to the new handicapping system, but I believe Our Dear Leader will further expound upon that.

Overall

Not having a cart girl on the course when it was that packed and slow is just dumb from a financial standpoint. I guess the restaurant was just taken over by new owners, and if they can't get a girl on the course, then the BGR can't give them a stamp of approval. Additionally, when one of our golfers attempted to buy a 6 pack special in the clubhouse at the turn the attendant insisted that only the cart girl offered that, yet not but one group before was that very 6 pack special was offered in the restaurant. Its hard to make sense of this course. Current pricing and historical cart girl performance would be a great combo, but at the current moment we can't offer up any better than 2 beers for Lexington Oaks.


Monday, January 6, 2020

The Classic - Spring 2020 Recap

The Lexington Oaks Massacre

Alright, so what happened?
  • cold, windy day
  • firm greens (newly re-built last summer)
  • wet course (makes it play longer)
  • super soft around greens (difficult to chip and run ball up)
There you go. If you can't land the ball on the green, and you can't land it short of the green, it's going to cause some big numbers. Not to mention Lexington has never been an easy ("fun") course. The leader board looks like a nightmare, but the guys who hit the ball the best were at the top.

I imagine the 13 pitchers in one day was a record. Five of them were due to the new USGA Course Handicap Calculation change. The double pitchers would have been double pitchers regardless.

While Faz made the only par on the 10 and 11... and Buchert the only par on 17 (super impressive)... Danny made the only par on #1, which is ridiculous and set the tone for the rest of the day.

56% of the field failed to make more than 2 pars or better. Also ridiculous.

The deadbeat list is only as good as what is told to me, and what I remember. So if you see something, say something. I'm fine with us having some pitchers owed and spreading them out at other events where the scores are better. But don't let it get out of control.

Anyway, that was entertaining. Good to be back.

----------------------------------

Next week we're going to Dunedin Golf Club for the first time in our stroke-play history.

It's an old Donald Ross design built in 1927. The Senior PGA Championship played there from 1945-1962, so it has a ton of old memorabilia on site.

Tee time is 9:30am (I think... booked it in the parking lot after a few beers... I'll confirm later). And cost is $50ish. Scorecard is here. Everyone is on WHITES unless you tell me otherwise.

We only have 16 spots, with 14 people confirmed.

See you then.

Wednesday, January 1, 2020

2020 PGA Fantasy Pool

Pool is now accepting entries.

$50 and selection sheet must be IN by 1/20/20.

Go here for the rules.

Payments and selections sent to me. Let me know if you'd rather fill it out on Excel. Good luck.