The doctors (not real doctors) are in! The fine gentlemen of the BGR are here to provide FBGC with some much needed leadership in these dire times. Dear Leader claims that none of us will be hungover for play on Sunday, but we at the BGR wholeheartedly deny these claims and know that our fellow club members will adhere to our club's social contract so we can prove that Hangovers Matter. We have used our past observations and proven BGR science to develop a plan for everyone to feel bad by the uncharacteristically late tee time for this event. We'll work our way down the tee sheet. Assume drinks are to be consumed between 9 PM and 1 AM on Saturday night unless otherwise noted.
Group A
Gorecki - 8 TBBC beers of your choice. Wake up early to rake the leaves.
Casey - Have Haven drop by two 6 packs of canned mules, drink them from a table that's 20% higher than anyone else's table around you.
Tall Mike - However many Yuenglings it takes before Vicki notices that you are drinking a lot of beer and says something to you...then four more Yuenglings.
Group B
Irish Dave - 7 Magners on the rocks, 
White Claws, No potatoes for breakfast.
Chandler - BYOP. All the Port. All the time. You're not done until you're singing Lou Bega songs to Rachael while cuddling with the toilet.
Dub - Show up late and then pretend like you're at Red Dog and buy 2 buckets to "share" and drink all of them as quickly as you can. Night caps of two double vodka sodas because just like on the course you have to make dumb decisions on the back.
Group C
Geoff - 6 fruity vodka drinks and 3 Miller Lites. Throw up on yourself during the last 1/18th of the night..
Ho - Drink a bunch of Molsons while trying not to talk about hockey.
Reid - 8 rum and coconut waters, stay closer to the bar than Dave would be by at least a tee box, sometimes 2.
Faz - 9 old fashioneds. In short glasses.
Group D
Brendan - Fill up the papoose, then empty the papoose. Just make sure to fill it up again in the morning.
Danny - 4 Hydroxochloroquines and 6 servings of antibodies. Cough all night, make sure it's dry.
Darren - 8 Bud Lights, 2 packs of cigarettes. Quit smoking at 10 PM, start again at 10:15 PM for your second longest streak ever.
Katie - Drink a whiskey drink, then a vodka drink, then a lager drink, then a cider drink, and sing the songs of the 90's devil music times
Group E
Melberg - Whatever everyone else thinks you should drink.
Gary - Coors Light appetizer, hearty red to pair with nachos, and let the old age do the rest.
Buchert - Do what you did at the World Woods house, and ice down two bottles of champagne for the morning.
Adam - see below.
I like this post even more than the pace of play one. I need some additional guidance. Is that four rounds where I have one in each hand and then a nightcap to hit my nimber?
ReplyDeleteNimbers, also called Grundy numbers, are introduced in combinatorial game theory, where they are defined as the values of heaps in the game Nim. The nimbers are the ordinal numbers endowed with nimber addition and nimber multiplication, which are distinct from ordinal addition and ordinal multiplication.
ReplyDeleteThis is way better BGR content than that last political post. 😆
ReplyDeleteI’ve liked all the BGR posts, they are great! Some solid info for this non-rated BGR course. Club house is closed. The pro shop sells convenient store cooler beers and boxed turkey sandwiches. Cart girl serves beer, liquor, and snacks. Not bargain based pricing. Can take cart to the parking lot. Pre-pack your coolers or bags if you are interested in any of these items!
ReplyDelete